The nonexistant lovelife of Legolas of Mirkwood
by IAmAFantasyFan
Summary: K-rated oneshot. Legolas, Hannah, rest of fellowship. Hannah falls into middle earth, becomes an elf, but DOES NOT FALL IN lOVE WITH LEGOLAS! (contrary to what the rest of the fellowship thinks.) After books, a few hours after Aragorn's marrage.


_**You should know that: Hannah has fallen into middle earth. She is rather a capable person, and had very little difficulty ajusting. She has turned into an elf, of no extrodinary beauty. She travelled to Helm's deep with a farmer's family, where she met the fellowship. Hannah became best friends with Eowyn, and helped retrieve fallen soldiers during the battle in Gondor. During their stay in Gondor after the quest was over, the fellowship noticed that Hannah and Legolas have grown very, VERY close. However, things may not be as they seem.**_

**Pippin's POV:**

It finally happened during the ball after Strider's wedding. I smirked, and nudged Merry as Legolas took Hannah outside to the gardens for a hopefully intimate conversation. They had been showing such affection for each other, I and the rest of the fellowship had been crossing our fingers and desperatly hoping that they would own up to their feelings. Now, with any luck, it looked like the ball was finally going to start rolling. Just to be safe, Merry and I snuck out into the gardens to try to eaves-drop on their conversation. I was, after all, very curious to see how it would all go. It took quite some time for us to sneak around and find them, but finally we managed to get into hearing distance.

"Oh, Legolas, really?" Hannah was saying, "surley you must be jesting." Merry and I exchanged smiles. Finally, she was calling him 'Legolas' rather than 'My Lord', or 'Sir Elf'. That had to be good.

"I am being perfectly honest." Legolas replied, "Hannah, I want you to be part of my family."

We could practacally hear the joy in her voice as she said "yes!". Merry looked delighted, and I felt the same way. Quietly, we snuck off to tell the others. Yes, they would be pleased to hear of this development.

**Legolas' POV:**

Finally, I could hear the Hobbits sneaking away through the underbrush. Hah! As if they could remain hidden from my elvin senses! I looked at Hannah.

"They have left." I said, "and I have an idea."

"When did they get here?" she asked, "for I only gradually became aware of their presence."

"Fortunatly," I replied, "not long. Only in time to hear you agreeing to be my sister." She smiled at me.

"So I guess they know now." she said, "and here I was hoping to shock them with the news! Legolas Thranduilion has a younger sister!"

"Actually," I smiled at my new sister, "I don't think that they do know."

"how could they not?" she looked puzzled.

"Well, they didn't hear you agreeing to beacome my _sister_, exactly. . ." comprehension dawned on her face.

"They think that you _proposed_ to me?" she asked, "Legolas, we could take advantage of this!" I grinned at her. My thoughts exactly.

"A game!" she crowed, "the first one of us to let it slip that we're becoming siblings, not husband and wife, loses!"

"That could actually be quite fun!" I smiled at my new sister. "Let's do it. And, I propose a bet."

Her eyes glinted in the starlight, and I instintively knew that this 'serious' and 'no fun' sister of mine (she has a great family resemblance to me) was very interested.

"What bet?" she asked. I grinned at her.

"I think that Gimli will be the first to figure it out."

"oh, no," she laughed, "it's defanitly going to be Eowyn, the busybody."

"three arrows says Gimli finds out."

"I'll give you.. um..."

"You'll make me three arrows." I said, "I'll teach you how."

"Okay," she said, "I agree. Now, brother dearest, I believe if we linger too long in the garden our dear friends shall create theroys as to what we are doing. And one more thing," she added, "no lying!"

"No lying," I agreed, "that would make it too easy."

**Hannah's POV:**

I laughed under my breath as Legolas and I returned to the ball room. This was going to be very entertaining. And to think that most assume the Prince of Mirkwood and the stranger of forgein lands had no humor! What would they say when the truth finally became known? Legolas walked over to congradulate Lord Aragorn again, and I saw Eowyn beckoning to me in the corner.

"Hannah!" she said, "do you have something to tell me?" _Wow, Eowyn, that's kind of blunt._

I giggled. "What makes you think that?"

"Oh, um..." Man, I still don't get how someone that smart can be so dumb sometimes.

"relax," I said, "I suppose Merry and Pippin told you?" Eowyn looked surprised.

"How did you know?" she asked.

"It was _Legolas_ that I was talking too, and they weren't exactly quiet." Pippin, who had been standing behind Eowyn looked crestfallen. Eowyn looked delighted though.

"So it's true?" she asked. I smiled at her,

"Yes, it is true." I said, "I am to be part of Legolas' family." _Not technacally lying._

"Oh, Hannah!" She squealed, "I'm so happy for you!"

"Thank-you." I grinned at her. _Hah! This was too easy._

**Eowyn's POV:**

"I am to be part of Legolas' family." Abigail said.

"Oh, Hannah!" I squealed, excitement bubbling in my chest, "I am so happy for you!"

"Thank-you." She grinned, and I saw a twinkle in her eye. Finally, Hannah owned up to her feelings, and she was calling Legolas by his name! This was a day to be remembered!

"Please excuse me," I said, "I must go talk to Arwen and congradulate her." "_And confirm the news"_ I added in my head. Arwen would be thrilled. Turning on my heel, I scanned the room for the new Queen of Gondor. Ah, there she was. I walked over to where she was sitting in the corner.

"I saw you talking to Hannah," she whispered, "is it true?"

"Yes!" I said, "Hannah and Legolas are to be married." She shreiked in delight, and Aragorn came over, worried about his new wife. Farimir followed behind, probably shocked; elves didn't normally fall over.

"What is the matter?" Aragorn asked, picking up Arwen from the floor.

"Legolas and Hannah have finally come to their senses!" Arwen explained, "and are to be married!"

"That's wonderful!" Farimir exclaimed, smiling at me.

"Eh? What's this I hear?" Gimli asked, coming up. "Has the Laddie finally woken up and come to his senses?"

"Yes!" I said, "isn't it so exciting?"

"It is!" he grinned, "they will be good for each other." Just then Legolas walked up.

"who will be good for each other?" he asked.

"Congradulations, Legolas!" Aragorn said, "I knew it would only be a matter of time." Legolas looked amused.

"Oh, yes." he said. "Thank-you."

"Laddie," Gimli broke in, "come with me for a moment, will you? I'd like to have a word in private." Legolas looked rather uncomfortable. Actually, he looked like the Eomer did when he was about to be found guilty of some prank when he was younger. I dismissed that as imagination, however, because obviously _Legolas_ wouldn't have played some school boy joke. Let alone on Gimli.

"Of course." he replied, and the two walked away together.

**Gimli's POV:**

"So, Laddie, congradulations!" I said, when we had reached the hall. Legolas smiled.

"Thank-you." he said.

"Do you know when the wedding will be?" Funny, Legolas looked pretty uncomfortable at that question.

"No, uh, I don't." I smiled at him.

"Have you asked your father?" leave it to the elf to mess up something like that.

"yes." Legolas said, "I have. He is very happy." Well that was a suprise.

"I didn't think you'd ever get married! You don't seem like the settling down type." I added in a whisper. Legolas smiled.

"No," he said, "I don't either."

"don't?" I asked, confused.

"Oh, sorry, didn't." Legolas said, "it's all very recent, you know."

"yes, it is." I frowned up at him. Something smelled fishy.

"Well, uh, I'vegottogotalktoHannahseeyoulaterGimli." he said, and walked hurridly back to the ball room. Humph. Fishy indeed.

**Arwen's POV:**

"So, Hannah," I said, "when's the wedding?" She laughed.

"I have no idea!" she said.

"Well, you won't want to wait too long, would you?"

"I guess not" Hannah said. I leaned in closer, and whispered

"Does he kiss well?" Hannah blushed furiously, and stammered that she didn't know.

"Well, I'm sure you'll want to find out." I said. Hannah made a noncommital noise. I frowned at her. "You're going to be marring him. Surley you want to kiss the elf." Hannah turned an even brighter shade of red.

"Not really." She said.

I frowned at her. "Why ever not?" Now Hannah was starting to look a little bit scared.

"Well..." she said, "um, uh, I guess..."

"Yes?" I prompted her. Seriously, that was a simple question. It should not be hard to answer.

"I am only ever going to kiss my husband." I smiled at her, amused.

"Hannah, he _is_ going to be your husband."

"I'm not married." Hannah argued, "Therefore I have no husband. Oh, look! There's legolas! Excuse me, please!" And she ran off after her fiancee. I smiled fondly after her. She was so obviously head over heels in love with Legolas, I bet that she had kissed him and just wasn't willing to admit it.


End file.
